Ignore it

Every time I read a post I feel inspired, encouraged, educated, uplifted.  I often feel some how more powerful by simply knowing this amazing group of people.  The courage that is shared whether your journey is to your first 5k or your about to embark on a Ironman has become contagious!  I thank you all for putting your adventures out there and allowing me to share in them.

But I have to admit that I am scared shit less about getting into Massanutten (MMT 100).  I know I have felt this kind of self doubt before.  I felt completely freaked out before my first 50k and then of course before each of the 50 milers I felt the doubt creep in.  But I chose to ignore it.  It would be great to be a well of confidence just bubbling up but the reality is I forget sometimes that I really can't do anything. 
That is not a typo.
I can't.  I can't run 100 miles.  I can't run marathons.  I can't.
That is if I try to do it myself.

I was so nicely reminded that I don't have to be sure that I can, what matters is I know that He can.
yes it is going to be one of those posts
Granted when I started running many years ago, I didn't consciously do it to get closer with God.  But that is what happened.  I found that as my miles piled up and my mind grew quiet, I was praying.  Suddenly I had found time to devote to a conversation that I had not really been holding up my end of before.
The work, the training, the time will be mine but I know that in the end this is something I feel drawn to do.  The blessing I have been given requires me to share it. 

This spirit of determination will help carry me through those things I am worrying about.  The rocks, snakes, cliffs, hills and hills and hills, the loneliness, the fatigue, the darkness, the unknown will all be here but I won't be alone.  I know that even with faith I may still not complete this next challenge.  I may be unable or unwilling to pull that strength up from inside myself and I might not finish or hit my goals but I do know that when I make it into the Massanutten Mountain Trails 100 it will be because I did have doubt. 
I just didn't listen to it.


What are you allowing doubt to steal from you?
Need a few words of encouragement, send me an email for a uplifting heart-to-heart.

Time to ponder

Even though I was tired and the hour was very late I was still moved at the thought that I was falling short.  Everyone had certainly enjoy the family Christmas eve traditions.  The kids had more toys than they could possibly need.  I sat in the quiet house after Santa had visited and took in the glow of the lights on our tree, I wondered if my family would even take time to remember why the coming day was being celebrated.

Knowing that in hours and a blur the Christmas morning festivities would be over I gave thanks that I can have hope.  I glad thanks that I can know that something far better than any of the wrapped gifts waiting to be opened is in store for me and everyone.

Remembering the true reason for this season and holding in my heart every day, I wish you and your family a moment of calm gratitude for the first Christmas gift.

Merry Christmas

 Since the Fire on the Mountain Trail 50k

 was postponed a week due to winter arriving last week I won't bore you with another goal post. 

You can go HERE and read it again to refresh your memory. 

Even with one less week between the 50k and the 50 miler I won't really change my goals.  I will run the 50k with the thought in mind of putting in a solid effort until I get to about half way.  At that point I'll see how I have done on the "unpracticed half."  If I am doing well and feeling strong I will try to negative split the course knowing the second half is "easier" technically and I should be able to make better time.  Then at about 8ish miles to go when I leave the logging "roads" and go into the single track again I will make the call to give it everything for that PR or cruise in for a solid training run.  

p.m run 6.5 miles ~ Day # 543

I've been feeling the weight of all the issues I've got going on right now.  The stress level has reached yoga-unremovable levels.  I knew I had to do something that would help give my mind a break.

Did I crack open a cold one?

Did I open a good book?

Did I pop a little pill?

Did I hide under the bed?

of course not

I went running....

in the dark....

under the stars...

in my new tight reflective leggings

new gear always makes things better when they help you feel skinny

My super great RelaxReflect tights!

I just ran.

And I remembered how much I loved it.d

Now my problems were not magically solved when I got back.  But I felt like they weighed a whole lot less on my shoulders.  I felt like I could trust that everything will work out; in my race, in my health, with my work, my schedule and my family.

As I ran through the dark occasionally feeling that tug of fear at being out there all alone I also felt that faith.  The faith that is with me every day get just a little bit stronger.  It reminded me that I will either live in fear or I will live in faith. 

It's all going to be just .... amazing!

Does new gear help get you out of a rut?

Do you think you can have fear and faith at the same time?

Do you think I should push at the 50k or save it for the 50 miler?

Thanks for your input! 

Now go out and have a wonderful weekend.

Run Strong to everyone raving this weekend.  To the many running the NYC Marathon this weekend, I know you are going to do some amazing things up there!

What If

I just finished watching Letters to Juliet last night while running on the treadmill.

I won't ruin the movie for you but I will share with you the first part of the "letter from Juliet" that was written in the movie, it read:

'What' and ‘if’ two words as nonthreatening as words come. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life: ‘What if?'..."

I believe that things happen for a reason in our lives. 

Today in one of the payments I processed I found this tract.

God is still speaking...

What if you are never quiet enough to hear Him?

On your next run take out those ear buds and just listen.

What are you asking Santa for?

Sunday ~ Day # 210

This weekend was filled with a lot.

A lot of running in one place.

A lot of wind and blowing snow.

A lot of housework.

A lot of playing.

A lot of preparing.

But finally Sunday morning we did what we haven't been able to do very often lately, we took time to slow down.  After church we attended a lunch and we lingered.  We visited with friends and family.

We even had a visit from Santa!

The cousins enjoyed getting to play together.

S'ghetti girl thinks maybe she is too old to sit on Santa's nap. 

But not too old to share her wish list with him!

LBM wasn't into sitting on a guy's lap but did enjoy his present! 

And made sure to tell Santa a few things on his wish list.

Thanks Santa.

It wasn't the weekend that I thought I might have.  I had been hoping for a early anniversary gift from Hubbs.

The half marathon kind.

But I didn't hint quite hard enough.

And to be honest, I enjoyed the break

of simply running

and stopping when I wanted to.

With the holidays we all are doing more than our fair share of racing around so my next race for now will still be Seneca Greenway Trail 50k and the the Hat Run 50k both are in early March. 

On my Christmas list this year, a strong mind and tireless legs.

What are you asking Santa for?



A Thanks-filled Day

I am thankful for...

The ability, time and will power to run races that I only dreamed about doing.

A little boy who creates fun out of not listening.

A daughter who tells me everything she ever hears, thinks or believes.

A husband who gives up so much so that we can be safe.

A faith that is with me even when I doubt.

A son, now a man, who fills me with pride.

Miles and miles and miles - thanks to jogging stroller - with my favorite running buddy.

Races with my husband!

My mommy.

A good night's sleep.

A love of reading.

Little feet that might follow me.

The change of the seasons.

A big family full of love that keeps growing.

Look for a window and not a wall

 It was a quiet weekend at home for the kids and I.

We had an unexpected loss in the family and due to the circumstances the kids and I were at home while Hubbs helped handled arrangements and attended services.

So it may seem odd that some of our running and playing took place in a graveyard but it really shouldn't.

Death is just another step in the journey we are on.  In many cases, a loved one's passing is the end of a painful struggle.  So for me this grave yard has always been a place a joy. 

A place of beauty for those who choose to allow that next step to be a window and not a wall.

Even LBM knows the happiness of that truth!

We even had our own bike-a-thon.  The winner got a cool fusebead medal!

Okay they both won their age groups.

 The kids raced and ran themselves exhausted! 

I thought about the events of the weekend while I was running this morning.

And I realized that that metaphor carries over to my running too.

I am always leaning on Him for support while I am looking for that window and praying I don't run into a wall.  Many times there have been windows that I have squeezed through and felt reengerized once I was on the other side.  Occassionally there has been a wall.  But I have always been provided with a way, a strength to overcome it. 

With Thanksgiving just days away, what is your best "you found a window" story?

Be thankful today.

Day # 197 3.5 ~ 28:20

Three Things Thursday

Because this is my "the world is mostly rosey" place but the world and life sometimes are not, I want to share some troubling news only to once again ask for your support.  And isn't that at least one reason why we are all here sharing with one another? 

There wasn't much sleeping last night at my house.  After my evening run with LBM I got some worrisome news about an extended family member, Shirley.  She is my sister's mother-in-law.  Now you might think that means she is really nothing to me however, I have know Shirley since I was in the middle school, had a crush on her son (yeah the one my big sister married, eeewwww) and shared nearly every holiday and picnic with Shirley's family.  We are a very close extended family unit.  I think it a rural folk's thing.

The details are not important just know she is in grave condition in the ICU in the hospital and could use all the prayers and positive thoughts you could have time to send her way.

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, nor shall the flame scorch you.

 ~ Isaiah 43:2

Because this is my "the world is mostly rosey" place and I live with the confidence that faith affords me, let's return to the regular living running banter.

 

Day # 123 ~ 3.5 miles / 28:10

It's Day #123 but who is still really counting?  me 

I have my miles in for today.  3.5 miles  It's a "rest" day.  I will be putting in two "rest" days of lower miles so that I can put in at least one longer run this weekend. 

I am hopeful to put in about 12 miles on Saturday morning.  I will be in VA so anyone interested drop me a line.  I am eager to see if giving my legs a "break" helps me feel more rest while still giving me the mileage I know I need with long races quickly coming.

What better to end with than a giveaway? 

Beth @ Shut Up and Run (which would have been Trap It and Run in my house growing up.  We were not allowed to say Shut Up.  Really!)  is hosting an $80 CSN Stores giveaway.

I have been trying to win this for EVER!  I really want a fancy backpack.  I think it will encourage the fam to get out and hike more. 

Hubbs is ALL about the gadgets!

Head over to CSN and see all the great stuff they have and then visit Shut Up and Run.

You know her?  She is that famous blogger who recently ran with Dean Karnazes! Not.kidding.

Tell her I sent you!

 

Three Things Thursday

Happy Birthday Erika

MCM Mama Goes Masters Race

Wednesday pm run ~ Day # 108

I ran my miles for MCM Mama Goes Masters virtual race

8.25 miles ~ 1:10:29

A rather unimpressive run as I have been struggling with tired legs

(Gee, you think? Day # 109 today)

but I am happy to say that I enjoyed my miles and the thoughts of Erika entering a new age group in her racing career.

Happy Birthday Erika!

When will this streak end?

Another opportunity to get an additional entry into my trio of giveaways

But anyone can submit their guess.

This crazy streak will come to an end.  The only question is, when?

So I thought it might be fun to make a bit of a game out of it.

If you want to submit your guess and have it count toward whatever prize I can come up with, send me an email to shellyrm at yahoo dot com

with the subject My Guess

and include 1) how many days you think I'll last - I am at #109 today

and 2) how many miles you think I'll have run - I am at 793.20

I will accept guesses until midnight Friday August 27th

The emails will not be opened until the streak ends

(so don't include anything you want me to read before then)

The winner will be the person or persons who comes the closest (but not over) on both numbers!

For those who question why/how I would/could run for so many days.

A demonstration that these are not just words but facts.

Isaiah 40:28-31 (NIV)

 they will walk and not be faint.

28 Do you not know?

Have you not heard?

The LORD is the everlasting God,

the Creator of the ends of the earth.

He will not grow tired or weary,

and his understanding no one can fathom.

29 He gives strength to the weary

and increases the power of the weak.

30 Even youths grow tired and weary,

and young men stumble and fall;

31 but those who hope in the LORD

will renew their strength.

They will soar on wings like eagles;

they will run and not grow weary,

What a difference a haircut can make

This morning I was up for an early morning run (3.5miles / 26:51) trying to beat the rainy weather that was to take over the entire day.  Then it was a normal day of racing to town to drop LBM at the sitter, off to work then rewind at the end of the work day. 

BUT today it did rain.  All day. 

Soccer practice was cancelled. 

There would be no second half to my morning run. 

What to do with that time?

I made a phone call.

Today would be the day I finally got my hair cut.

After over 2 1/2 years of waiting I would finally do it.

I know you think it's only hair but by giving it to an organization like Locks of Love it makes that whole process a little more emotional.  I put on a happy face but as I sat in that chair I couldn't help but think about my father who lost his life to cancer, a local young lady who our entire area embraced as she battled cancer and several young children who are still fighting the battle against childhood illnesses.

I thought what a small gesture it was to simply help in this way.  So after a few teary eyes remembering those who have ended their battles...

...I am happily saying good bye to my long hair and sending it on with my donation to help those who will take such comfort in being able to look more like themselves at a time when they need to feel " normal" again.

If you never have donated please consider it, if not your hair then send a check no amount is too small.  The simple gift of normalcy for a child who is facing something no child should ever have to is priceless.

And this is me now.

I hope that somewhere soon there will be a smiling face seeing themselves and feeling pretty simply because I cut my hair.

Run Fast Mommy Is hosting a Tanks and Tunes Giveaway!
Girl Gets Strong is hosting a Ryders Eyewear Giveaway!