What a wonderful fun-filled weekend our family enjoyed! It was an unusually short one with the super secret spy not being off an extra day like we have gotten so used to thank to the holidays but we still packed a lot of family time into the hours we had.
Sporting my new ChiRunning hat. Part of my HBBC haul!
I finally got outside and enjoyed the milder weather on a nice run around VA. Not the 24 miles long run that this week called for but a nice rework of the plan allowed for more family time and still a decent long hilly run. With safety being brought back to the forefront of my mind and I am certain many other's too, I have been struggling with getting outside for long runs. That feeling of safety is something I have to work on getting back. Maybe it's more a need to feel prepared and aware.
After a messing weekend we did have to do some chores like cleaning the floors. Which was made easier with the Shark. Even the kids didn't mind helping especially helping to put the box to good use.
LBM can make everything chore more fun with his antics!
Teamarcia got a little free press with S'ghetti girl's new shirt.
Speaking of shopping, I noticed something troubling while we were shopping.
You might notice that I don't wear a wide variety of clothes. I wear the same running outfits frequently and even in casual photos I am often sporting the same argyle purple or black sweater. That is because I don't like to shop. So I don't do it very often.
If fact the only pair of blue jeans that I own that fit were purchased about 7 years ago. They look terrible on me now and were part of the reason I finally gave in and went shopping.
The other reason is that my poor dressing habits have be adopted by my beautiful daughter.
I am not doing her any favors setting such a terrible example.
While I don't want her to be too wrapped up in her appearance, I do want her to care about herself enough to look her best given the situation.
I guess I want her to take pride in looking nice to an appropriate degree.
It's a fine line, right?!
S'ghetti girl lives in seat pants. If it is not warm enough to wear skirts she will be wearing one of a few pair of sweats that she owns. While sweats have their place they shouldn't be the only pants she wears.
Enter the dreaded Blue Jean label.
We went to countless stores and until the next to last store every single label share one word:
First off, my daughter is of an appropriate for her height and age. She is healthy and beautiful. While she may not be a active as some children she is by no means over weight. Yet time and time again she was told that her body was somehow not "right" after she tried on pair after pair after pair of blue jeans.
Of course, no one said that directly to her but I can remember being that adolescent girl struggling with no longer being a child and not yet being ready to be what come next. Even though I repeatedly told her that everyone has to go through all these different styles and cuts to find the pants that fit them best, she was still brought to tears in the dressing room after dozens of pairs simply didn't work with her shape.
I h.a.t.e that word.
If you really follow me you know that I never use that word. The H one.
There is very little worse than seeing your daughter struggle with something that shouldn't even be an issue. I tried my best to tell her that it's just a pair of pants. And we did find several that she would agree to wear and honestly they a super cute on her. I just worry that everything she wears them she will remember the experience and view herself negatively.
I wish I had a magic ball to see if this one experience was going to affect her or if all the praise and love she is given daily will be enough to give her the confidence she should have. Something, some comment or person or situation caused me to view myself differently than the reflection in the mirror which lead to years of pointless self confidence issues. Was it the nicknames in grade school? Was it the "special" jeans (Rosebud duds. I was really thin as a young child) that set me apart from the other kids?
Whatever it was I just don't want there to be an it for my daughter.
I need her to know the true, that she is smart, kind and important!
How can you over come an entire industry seemingly set on brain washing your kids?
What a powerful ending to this post! This is something I see everywhere, every day and wonder... why?!?!? Why are we doing this to kids?!?!? My cousin is very much unhealthy and overweight and while thankfully her tween daughter has not picked up on her habits, quite the opposite, instead she all but starves herself so she doesn't! It greatly saddens me because you should not be worrying about stuff like that when you're 11!!! So much emphasis is laid on being "skinny" but it really needs to be about being "healthy." "Skinny" jeans aren't even that great, I'm fairly certain that most would consider me well within the "skinny" guidelines and I look terrible in skinny jeans. Skinny jeans are not for everybody, so why are they becoming the "norm" when they are anything but?!?!?ReplyDelete
Also, FWIW, I don't doubt that S'ghetti girl will forget about this shopping trip sooner than you think because your words of encouragement and support will feed her confidence every day. Keep up the good work momma!
^ ^ Could not have said it better than Redhead!ReplyDelete
It's truly sad to see young girl's minds getting warped by these unrealistic images. Your children are all lucky that you put so much effort into teaching them healthy habits as well as healthy body image and self-confidence.
I could write a novel an all the self-esteem issues I endured (and still do) with my daughter and what society paints at the perfect size. It's soooo hard! Honestly, stretch jeans from the Gap (worked there over the holidays) are awesome! They fit every body cuz...they stretch :). Regardless, you're an awesome mom and I know you had the right words for her along with your amazing influence on her! Someday, I should write about my twins when one weighed 165 and one 62. Yeppers, that was special!ReplyDelete
+1 on what Morgan said. Well put!ReplyDelete
Pant size says nothing. It doesn't. Being healthy and a healthy body image do matter. She couldn't have wished for a better mom - a mom that's not pushing her towards skinny guidelines and loves her enough to write about this.
You conveniently leave web pages open that show how much photoshopping is done on models. Here's a good start:ReplyDelete
(I use that one in my class.)